You’ll often hear this myth about the bonding time between mother and baby, that the first few months are the most important for a mother making that bond with her child, and absolutely it is. But why is it any less important for dads? Now if your reading this and thinking of course it what are you talking about? You only need to look at the difference between maternity and paternity to give you an idea of the caszim between the two according to our government.
Look at the way Finland looks at this. Finland is one of the most progressive countries in Europe and according to a fairly recent report, Finland is the only country in the world where fathers spend more time per day with their children than their mothers; not by a huge amount but still. Now let’s look at what happens here in the UK or even the United States, statistically it’s hugely weighted towards the mothers, but this isn’t an argument about gender equality it’s an argument about what’s right for the children. Statistically speaking a child will grow up to have a better more prosperous life with two parents in the home, but, a father shouldn’t just be present he should be involved, especially in the early years. This year Finland will go a step further by allowing each parent to take 7 months paid paternity leave. They do this because this is a country that recognises equality and the need for a father not only to be present but taking part.
Now of course in this country you can share parental leave, but there is no man I know that would take time off their partner, not due to not wanting too but because of social foe pars.
We need to recognise that as a father you are just as important as a mother , you and your baby need daddy time too, you must be allowed that time to bond with your child, create that connection, but also relieve the pressure your partner is feeling! especially as a new mum it’s not easy.
Don’t let anybody tell you that the first months are all about bonding between a mother and child they are wrong. It’s about bonding as a family, learning as a father and growing as a man.