I went into 2020 filled with cynicism, contempt for almost everyone and a belief that you are the centre of your own world and not much else really matters. I’ve left 2020 with a new sense of purpose, and a will to help others.
‘You must be the change you wish to see in the world’ a famous and powerful statement from Gandhi, that in my case has never been more true than it is today.
As many of us battle with our own mental health demons; many of which have been brought on by the coronavirus pandemic, we must stop looking to the government for answers or support, we must look inwards at ourselves and our fellow human beings.
I started my blog Nobody Cares About Dad as a place to dump what I call my brain farts, wondering if one person other than my wife read it i’d be happy, but it’s turned into much more… this blog has been viewed in most countries on earth! For a guy that like I’ve said many times barely survived English it fills me with a huge sense of pride.
On the back of feedback from people I also launched a podcast where I talk to dads about their life experience, with the aim simply to get us dads talking, and talking they did! I’ve been inundated with messages from dads wanting to share their experiences, as I write this I currently have 20 podcasts lined up to record.
I guess what I’m saying here is I’m really trying hard to be a better husband, a better father but more importantly a better person. 2021 has given my spirit a bolt of lightning from the Gods, from the arms of Zeus himself, with this and despite my own mental health being called into question during these lockdowns, I want to make a difference do something worthwhile and stop wasting my life.
This year I’m raising money for CALM by challenging myself to do things I’ve never done, for example run a marathon, I mean come on look at the size of me! I’ve never really done anything that hasn’t had some material benefit to me, I’ve been an inherently selfish person, so this year I will endeavour to change this.
I didn’t grow up with a dad, I knew his name I knew where he was but I didn’t have a male role model to look up to and teach me how to be a man, someone to show me right from wrong. Thats not to say I’ve grown up to become a monster, far from it, but I want my son to look at me and be proud of me, I want him to say “that’s my dad” this is why in 2021 I hope to rise like a Phoenix from the flames, having looked inwards let me now look outwards and be the change you wish to see in the world.
Many people are going to be in need of help and support, if we are going to rebuild our society , our culture then the attitude of “charity starts at home” has to be no more. we are in an unprecedented time in our lives, don’t pull up the draw bridge lower it, don’t switch off your phone answer it. Be someone your parents would be proud off, I lost my mother 3 years ago now, 2 days before my son was born and I know that she would be proud of the man I am trying to become.
My email address is firstname.lastname@example.org if you are struggling and want to talk to someone then please feel free to get in touch with me, maybe I can help maybe I can guide you in the right direction of someone that can.
New Podcast is now live