Nobody Cares About Dad

Let’s be brutally honest for a moment: a lot of the activities our children partake in are…well, less than thrilling. I can almost hear the chorus of outraged parents clamouring, “Certainly not my child!” But yes, even yours. Whether it’s enduring the annual swimming gala or sitting through yet another Christmas nativity play, let’s ask ourselves a hard question: would we ever attend these events if our own flesh and blood weren’t participating? The answer for most would resoundingly be “No.” However, it’s vital to remember who these moments are truly magical for: our kids. Your presence alone can turn an ordinary day into an extraordinary one for them. So, when you do show up, really show up. Don’t let your phone steal these precious moments. Just last week, at my son Leo’s football game, a child confronted his father, who was more engaged with his screen than the game, asking why he was always on his phone. As parents, these are not the memories we want to forge.

Reflecting on my own childhood, I was often the kid with scant support in the stands. My father was absent, and my mother, juggling four kids on her own, couldn’t possibly attend every event. Despite being a bit of a sports wonderkind, it wasn’t until I took to the stage that my mother could make it to watch. Those performances were always my best. Trying to impress our parents is a universal child endeavour because, in our eyes, they are the apex of our world. Recently, I sat through a two-hour primary school swimming gala that I was less than enthusiastic about attending. Watching young kids barely make ten meters in the pool isn’t anyone’s idea of a thrilling afternoon. Yet, being there for our kids is paramount. It’s a sacrifice worth making, reminding us that we’re not the most important people in our children’s lives—they are.

Surprisingly, the turnout of fathers at the gala was heartening. Contrary to my expectations, it wasn’t just a mother-dominated event. This attendance shift sparked a bit of introspection about my childhood. Growing up without much, including a present father, has motivated me to be the best parent I can for my child. I’ve experienced the loneliness of being the child left on the sidelines or the awkward third wheel. Those memories drive me to ensure my child never feels that way.

This piece isn’t just a nudge for dads to step up—it’s a broader call to action for all parents to be present, engaged, and involved. It’s also a plea to mothers who, for various reasons, might prevent their children’s fathers from being present. The impact of such actions on your children can be profound and far-reaching. Parenting requires selflessness. It’s about putting our children’s needs and feelings before our own. So let’s make a collective effort to be there for our kids, not just physically, but emotionally and attentively. After all, showing up is the easiest yet most significant gift we can offer our children. And it’s entirely free.